“Va-gi-NA” whisper it a few times, then say it louder and louder. Eventually you will start feeling the power of the word and the internal power that exists within yourself. It took me a while to say or even acknowledge my vagina. I am currently 27 – still young, always independent and a womanly force – however my confidence and independence may be noticeable to others but internally I haven’t always recognized my power, let alone sexual independence. Although a native to Los Angeles there wasn’t always the Hollywood glamour that shined through my eyes. The lack of images of Black women not only within Hollywood but also the media in general made me feel insignificant growing up. The hypersexual images of Black girls and women confused me as they didn’t help me connect to my thicker than most LA women’s body. I developed a comedic sense to mask some of the pain behind well not being seen. I dated around a lot, if well is that what we are calling friends with benefits now, trying to find myself in the warm embraces of others. Often I saw myself only as a pleasure object to others leaving me disengaged in sex. Through the years as I’ve grown into loving myself, but I definitely have learned some lessons the hard way. I come into a better relationship with my hips, especially in my new position as an assistant casting director for a top movie agency. Now I’m trying to find myself through myself as I juggle, career, love, friends and my family.
